Patrick Lencioni of the Table Group has a book we use a lot at work called The Five Dysfunctions of a Team.  In fact, all employees of our company get a copy of the book when they on-board and after a few months I sit down with them to discuss the role it plays in how we run the company.  It’s a great read and when used to its fullest extent it can be very effective.  It creates a very cohesive team and leadership.

You see, having a cohesive leadership team can be a strong competitive advantage.

The foundations of this book are built on a five-level pyramid, with the foundation being trust.  Trust in your relationship with the other person to be able to speak freely to each other about all topics, even hard ones.  The next level is conflict, where you can have open and honest dialogue.  Then comes commitment, where once a decision is made you fully support whether you agree with the decision or not.  After commitment is accountability, where you actually do what you said you would do and not try and sabotage the decision.  The top of the pyramid is results.  If you do all the things below in the pyramid correctly, you will likely get the results you want.  Fail at any of the steps below, you will likely not get the results you want.

Since your job as a leader is to get results through other people, following something like Lencioni model will likely get you better results all the time.

I often get asked what does trust really mean.  Am I trustworthy or not?  Trust in this sense has nothing to do with whether you are trustworthy or not.  It takes trustworthy people to operate in this model but that’s not what it means.  Trust means you have enough trust in our relationship to be able to challenge my thoughts, disagree with my opinion and tell me like it is without fear that you will hurt my feelings or fear that I will retaliate against you.  I have enough respect for you that I trust your opinion and need it to help me make good decisions.  My trust is strong enough that I will seek you out to help me make the best decision I can as I know you will challenge my thoughts to talk about things I may be missing.  I have no fear of being vulnerable with you because I trust our relationship.

In our teachings here at work I find that the trust levels differ among members of any team, whether that is the leadership team or project teams.  I find the trust level is higher with people who have known each other longer than with those that are new to the team.  That’s because the relationship is stronger and therefore trust flows easier.  You generally can have a more open conversation with someone you know than with someone you just met.  I can speak more openly with my wife than I can with a neighbor that just moved in next door.

The way to develop trust is to develop the relationship and the way to develop the relationship is to have conversations.  Get to know people on the team.  Be open and inquisitive with all team members, especially the newer one.  I find those that are more open to building relationships get to the trust level quicker than those that are hesitant to develop the relationship.  Those people that require you to prove yourself before they let you into their inner circle also have difficulty with trust.  I have to earn your trust before you can trust me.

Last Sunday I heard about how relationships should be about me being loyal to you not you being loyal to me.  But unfortunately, we expect more loyalty from the other person than we are willing to give.  It’s that trust factor.  I’ve been burned before so I am not going to expose myself to that experience again.  I will dish out my trust in spoonful’s but I demand you give me your trust in buckets.  That type of relationship can be very disposable and transactional.  I find it hard to have a meaningful relationship with those that I have to earn their trust than with those that just give it to me.

Do I have to earn your trust or do I have to burn your trust?

If as a leader I will not give you my trust until you earn it, what type of relationship does that develop?  Not a very effective relationship in my opinion and I doubt you will get the results you want or need.  If on the other hand you give your trust out up front in the relationship and monitor the feedback you get, I believe that will develop a deeper relationship and the trust will be deeper.  Personally, I would rather do more for someone who I know trusts me and has my back, than for someone who I have to watch out for, waiting for the axe to fall.

As a leader I believe it is very important to develop strong relationships with your staff so that you can build a relationship around trust.  By doing that you get to the foundation of the Lencioni model quicker, get a healthier dialogue, talk about the hard things that need to be fixed and can make fuller commitments with each other, even if you disagree with the decision.  Hold yourself accountable and I believe you get better results.

If you on the other hand hold back your trust you will likely not have very effective communication, won’t be able to talk about the hard things, will get very little if any commitment and people won’t be willing to take action due to fear.  That will get you results, but not the ones you want or need.

If you have a cohesive leadership team that is a strong competitive advantage as you can take action quicker, everyone is in lock step on the decisions being made and everyone is committed to get the results.

It is not very often you see that model in today’s workplace.

So, if you are willing to have your trust burned instead of earned, you may be onto something here.

 

Allyn Vaughn

 

Photo by Christoph Deinet on Unsplash