Whatever happened to the social in social media!
It seems the more and more I read social media the more it doesn’t sound so social to me anymore. We use social media in so many ways now. It lets us have instant access to have a voice. To say what is on our minds. But does it give us the right to behave badly?
Webster defines social as “engaged in for sociability and tending to form a cooperative relationship with others”. Social media can be a place to gather and share ideas, common interests and viewpoints on certain issues. It can also be used to stay in touch with your friends and family.
Social media is also being used to subject opinions on others or to attack those that do not agree with their viewpoint. In the early days of social media we had people who just wanted to provoke an argument. It seemed all they wanted to do was stir things up, sit back and watch the on-line fights that occurred. We called them trolls. Ignore them and they got bored and would go to another spot to dish out their trash and start arguments.
Unfortunately these trolls taught others that bad behavior on social media was acceptable or at least partially tolerated. Today we have a polarized social community. I see too many posts where people bicker back and forth about opposing opinions. There never seems to be much middle ground until it goes too far. Then people start to chime in and show some of the normalcy that social media should be. There are more areas on social media that behave socially than those that don’t, but it seems the non-social ones stick out more.
Now don’t get me wrong, I am not advocating social media should be a platform where everyone is supposed to get along. A place of pure harmony. That doesn’t exist in the world so why should social media be forced to do it.
I believe social media is a place to share opinions and differing opinions. What I am advocating is that social media be used to share and express opinions like you would if you had a conversation with the other person in the same room. Say what’s on your mind but do it in a polite and professional way. Be courteous with your opinion. Don’t use social media to force your opinion on me and slam my opinions. Use social media to have conversations.
Freedom of speech is a powerful right or even a luxury we have here in the USA.
I have the right and freedom to say what’s on my mind. I literally have the freedom to say whatever I want to say, even though I know others may and will feel much differently. But the freedom of speech comes with an obligation. It does not give me or you the right to hurt others deliberately with our words, attack others verbally, or sit behind a keyboard and slam a community. Just because you have the right to say something, doesn’t mean you should.
You see, the obligation I have to own the right of freedom of speech is to use it wisely. Say what I want, ask questions and state my opinions, but do it in a wise manner. Rather than scream from your keyboard that the opposite side sucks and doesn’t know the facts, rather say I cannot understand why you feel the way you do. Could you tell me more about why you feel this way so that maybe I can better understand. What am I missing? Be curious and ask questions. Don’t assume.
What would you do if you were in a room with a hundred people or even a thousand people and someone came in screaming at the top of their lungs, calling everyone idiots and trying to force their opinion on the rest of us? We generally would think to ourselves who let that crazy person in? Can’t that person just shut up and let us go on with our gathering? Or can someone please get that person to leave, they are being very rude and disruptive. Depending upon the nature of the social gathering, that person might be forced to leave or arrested.
If we think people are crazy for being disruptive in a live social gathering, why would someone think it is okay to do so in social media? Sitting behind a keyboard, pounding out your opinion and forcing it on others in the group, page or social media platform is not going to get anything accomplished other than get people stirred up. The people who don’t like confrontation will shut up and eventually leave, and those who don’t mind it will chime in and stir it up more.
If you feel strongly about something and want to make a change use your freedom of speech to spark a conversation, not an argument. If you don’t like the political landscape in the world, your country or community, use your freedom of speech to spark a conversation, not an argument. You want someone else to see things the way you see them, use your freedom of speech to spark a valuable conversation, not an opinion war. Don’t waste your right to freedom of speech on an argument.
Use your freedom of speech to spark powerful conversations. And use your freedom of speech wisely, because you have an obligation to do so.
If you want to spark powerful and meaningful conversations, rather than to just get your opinion out there, you may be onto something!
Allyn Vaughn
Photo by William Iven on Unsplash